Dear Diary #22 (Dream)

Dear Diary,

I was exhausted yesterday so i slept at 10
Didn't wakeup until 9 today

What I am trying to say is... i had a dream last night, an usual one. Giving me a bit of lonliness after waking up, more of missing however.

In my dream, I have a long met friend, his name is "豪", I called him "呀豪" in my dream.

The background world... i'm pretty sure it's not earth, cause everything's so perfect, but the place looks like a mix of Canada and HK that's it. Other than 呀豪, some others that I have met in Canada showed up in dream as well.

The story starts with... yea, after a Sunday morning and the mass's over (weird, I have not been to a mass for long time already). I went there with 呀豪 and some of my friends from Canada. Perhaps there was too many people, when the mass's over, everyone tried to flush outside of the place and we were separated. It took me about 15 to 30 mins to relocate the scattered friends (surely the place was big, some of us had to leave from the underground tunnel because the frontdoor was so crammed already. The exit of the tunnel leads us to the foot of the hill wihle the frontdoor of the church is located at the waist of it)

I was able to contact everyone, except for 呀豪. So I kept searching for him, others joined to help as well, but regradless of how hard I searched, I still couldn't find him. I thought he might go to some places that he would go usually, so I traveled everywhere that I know to see if I was able to find him; gardens by gardens, places by places, houses by houses, doors by doors, but I could still find nothing. Others helped and tried to search in different places, but their efforts were also in vain.

And so the bright morning and afternoon were gone and soon the sun had set... I had no other means but to tell 豪's parent that he's gone missing. His parents were not very happy when they saw me, for I am his best friend, yet I lost him, and I failed to find him.

One thing very special abt 豪's house is that, his house is a restaurant, more like a pub actually. The ground floor's for business and Ho's bedroom is at the second floor.

I decided to wait in his room, hopefully he would return as time pass by... but he didn't.

When it is almost dawn of the next day. His father decided to search for 豪 himself and he brought me along. I never knew where was the confidence he showed from,the only emotion I had received from his was his unsatisfactory of losing and not capable of finding 豪 despite I am his best friend, but scarcely any fear or worry of his son gone missing. On his way driving, he scolded me again another time for failing to my best friend. He scolded me in such an angry tone that I can still remember the words he said:

"You claimed to be my son's best friend, yet, HOW MUCH do you really know of him, HUH?"
I wanted to argue that I do, but when I tried to list examples for myself such as... I knew where he'd go usually, I noticed: ".. just because I he appeared to be in those places for that one time does not mean anything"
... and nothing else?

"You don't know my son," 豪's dad continued "If you knew him, you would understand him, you would look at him closely and understand him better than now you do!"
The day had become bright again just as he drove and talked, and while he was still talking, I could already see 呀豪 through the windshield, running before the car... there's a plastic toy plane before him and he's flying it happily... running, and enjoying himself blissfully.

After being scolded by his dad, this time I wanted to pay full attention to all his acts, to understand him better and watch him closely; until this moment, I started to notice that he was so bright as if his person's growing (he is, in the dream, is that because he was dressed in white?), his body seemed so light and young while he kept runnign and jumping, playing and having fun like the purest and happiest soul... (he looked like 8 years old kid in my dream, at that moment)

豪's dad parked the car beside the grassfield, we stopped and just kept our eyes on 豪 quietly... and I told myself: "Yea, from this day on, I will look at his every act carefully now, to understand him better..."


---

Of course, I was a little bit missing that 呀豪 after waking up from my dreams. But since I know it's not real (i felt like i was 16 or younger in that dream, wthbbq <--- swearing is a mark of growth), there is nothing much that really worths feeling regretful for.

And it's half-past 9, I slept 11 hours... godforbid, i still have work undone, so I had to crawl out from bed asap.

I did, have a friend called 豪 before when I was small, studying in primary school. He was my best friend, a quiet person... and.. yea, I have not seen him anymore ever since graduating from my highschool. Thinking of him reminds me of the happy times we had together when we were small.

I hope he is still doing fine on the other side of earth... does he still remember me? Would he still think of me every now and then?...

I pray for you, my long-ago friend, the memory shards of you are still with me...
Have a nice day, hope you can laugh as happy and innocent as you did in my dream.