This had happened before

Rethink of what I had done.
It happened before too, twice.

The first time, I was trying to launch a tide of discipline in my FPS game guild. To train a better team, discipline is the first thing to govern, that's my logic.

What I had done was pretty simple: as a council member of the guild, I started a rule without counseling other council members to ban foul language usage within the guild.
In the long and tiring debate followed afterward, I bashed everyone for how their sloth and indiscipline caused them the matches. They on the other hand accused me for overreacting and being zealous.

Prohibiting a certain kind of language may seem harsh, but I thought it was a healthy way to train discipline within the members. It is the same logic to cut chatter during a military operation. Since the members themselves did not possess any strong bond of teamwork between each others, I figured the most effective way to compensate for that was to turn them into obedience gears.

The resistance was heavy and the rule was eventually overruled without the support of other council members.
A perfect demonstration of democracy, something we should cherish - though the match team afterward remained the same weak.
Individually speaking, their skills and sense were good. Failed as a team though due to perhaps their personal pride and style.

The second time, I used the same method of creating a scar to leave memories marked in a person's head.

The matter was also quite simple. I was in another guild of another game with a bunch of friends. All were good until 1 of the friends who was also an admin of the channel started abusing his admin power on me, figure it would be fun to kick me out of the chat channel and see me join back, to kick me again.

After protesting for a time, weeks later when he repeat the same thing again, I asked the guildmaster to remove my title as a member before the eyes of everyone.

My evil friend asked me not to do that because the message I want to deliver and the message others perceive will not be the same, and I will only be perceived as narrowminded.

I showed acknowledgement to her but persisted in doing so. The effect was permanent


Now that out of my expectation, I have done it again... I do not doubt that the outcome may repeat itself and chance of having things running in the way I like is slim - but that I do not care.

Let the others think in the way they want. I believe I am right, it's all for the greater good. I want to see changes, so somebody has to do something, otherwise justice will be lost. The weight of such burden, I will carry it.
I won't enjoy it, but this I see as a practice, an ordeal I must go through.

I never lost hope in people, I love them, but I hate them at the same time.